The following guidelines
are what we use in our meetings here in New York City. Each member
receives a copy.
1. The PURPOSE of the meeting is to more fully communicate with
each other our fellowship with God and His workings in our hearts,
and to hold each other accountable for what the Lord has given us.
The first disciples walked
with Christ together. Our fellowship as a body is as rich or
as shallow as our communication with each other. As we share with
each other how we are "working out our own salvation with fear
and trembling" we are able to know each other more deeply and
love each other more fervently. We truly see we are "members
one of another" and all part of one body.
We are called to "bear
one another’s burdens." It is only when we "see"
the need in another’s life that we can develop a burden for them.
Fuller and more transparent communication enables us to suffer when
another suffers and rejoice when they rejoice. Increased sensitivity
to one another will spur us to pray and intercede for each other more
perfectly.
As disciples of Christ
we are called to diligently follow Him. As "stewards" of
the mysteries of God we are accountable for what we have received
from God. We are required to be faithful doers of the word and not
hearers only. Our care for another should include exhortations to
faithfulness and holding one another accountable to the standards
Christ has set for us. In coming together, we seek to edify, exhort
and comfort one another. As those who are hastening to meet the Lord,
we desire to be personally challenged by our brethren and at the same
time we wish to "consider" others and "provoke"
them unto love and good works.
2. Share PRESENT
dealings of the Holy Spirit in one’s life.
Sharing the challenges
which God is presently giving us is a mark of humility which
encourages others to "open up" and share similar experiences
in their walk.
Relate when and how (through
what means) God began dealing with you in a new and fresh way about
a specific area of obedience He is requiring of you.
In sharing present (or
past) struggles or sin, be discreet about details.
Before sharing, ask the
Holy Spirit how much detail is necessary in order to communicate the
nature of your struggle.
Never share something
which will prove an embarrassment to another (whether they be present
or absent, believer or non-believer, adult or child.)
3. Be CAREFUL
not to move too quickly on to a completely different subject.
Sufficient space should
be allowed for the Holy Spirit to "quicken" others in regards
to a given area of obedience before the group’s "gears switch"
to a new subject.
Give the Holy Spirit space
to allow others to share similar struggles about that area or minister
what God has taught or is teaching them about it.
4. Do not
feel it necessary to RESOLVE every issue in a given meeting.
Oswald Chambers wrote
that we are often "baffled to fight better." Paul wrote
we are "perplexed, but not in despair." Sometimes it is
important to simply state where our struggle lies. "Confess your
faults one to another." We should be "quick to hear"
and "slow to speak."
Be prayerful throughout
the meeting.
Particularly when others
share a struggle or burden be prayerful about your contribution. There
may be immediate help you can give, whether in the group or privately,
but this may not always be the case. It may be necessary now that
you are aware of another’s struggles to carry their burden in
your spirit and continue in prayer for them.
Rather than having immediate,
easy answers, it if often more comforting to know that people know
of our struggle and will be praying for us. Remember Job’s "comforters."
Sensitivity should be
exercised as to when, where and how one who has shared a burden should
be prayed for.
Immediate, on-the-spot
prayer is sometimes called for and other times should be refrained
from.
Prayer should conclude
each meeting.
5. Maintain
FOCUS.
Meetings which allow for
"free discussion" often have difficulty staying focused,
as people wish to share various experiences which sometimes are not
pertinent to the issues at hand.
Outside of the most urgent
requests that need to be brought to the group’s attention, requests
for prayer can be made in other meetings or privately to individuals
before or after the meeting.
Effort should be made
to keep the meeting focused. For the reason the moderator should be
allowed to "move" the conversation.
The moderator will take
his/her cue from the "Monthly Review." The ‘review"
will provide direction for the discussion as those present relate
how they have responded to and applied current "words of exhortation"
given in the past month to our church family.
This does not mean the
Holy Spirit cannot change the order of the meeting. "The wind
blows where it wills." Yet, outside of such a "move"
attention should remain on the "review."
6. Keep within
time LIMITS set for the meeting.
Although there can be
a direction of the Holy Spirit to extend the meeting, in general,
the moderator should begin and end the meeting at specified times.
Those wishing to stay and fellowship or pray with each other more
may do so once the meeting has "officially" concluded.
In light of the limited
time of our meeting each member of the group should be considerate
of the others and be careful not to "monopolize" the conversation.
Keep stories particularly
of past experiences, brief and to the point.
7. Let the
chief rule of each meeting be LOVE.
Interacting with others
always includes the possibilities of being "rubbed the wrong
way" or rubbing someone else the wrong way.
Irritations, even offenses
may come. But "let brotherly love continue."
Use such irritations to
practice more of the love, gentleness and patience of Christ.
May the world know we
are His disciples by the love we have one for another.
Michael Beck is Pastor of The House of Prayer, Brooklyn
